


Saved by you

by lawlight_trash



Category: Free!, Sayonara Zetsubou-Sensei
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, M/M, Suicide Attempt, but it's like cute too, swimming boys meet depressed teacher
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-11
Updated: 2017-05-13
Packaged: 2018-10-30 15:38:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10879812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lawlight_trash/pseuds/lawlight_trash
Summary: Due to his frequent suicide attempts, Itoshiki Nozomu and Nanase Haruka cross paths. Makoto gets involved too and he doesn't want to let go of the weird but somehow adorable man who is more than happy to take a break from his despairing life.





	1. Life is not a choice

Scrubbing classroom windows with an old, wet rag has never been one of Haru’s favourite things to do, but his class had cleaning duty today so there was not much he could do about it. At least Makoto was there with him. His presence was soothing and nice, so this wasn’t that bad after all. Haru scrubbed the windows really slowly, mostly just staring at the pool, which was kind of frustrating. He wished he could jump into the water right now and forget about everything. It was a wonderful feeling, being held by the water, not really hearing anything, just concentrating on getting further and further ahead. It’s good that the weather has gotten warm enough to use the outdoor pool.  
“Are you done, Haru?” he heard Makoto’s voice from behind. He quickly finished cleaning the last window and climbed down the metal ladder.  
“Everyone’s leaving, we should go home soon too” he added.  
“I’m staying” Haru said. He had plans.  
Makoto wasn’t surprised. “Going for a swim? Okay, I’ll be going then. Take care, Haru-chan!” he said with a smile on his face before turning around and catching up to Rei and Nagisa.  
Haru put the ladder and the rags back to their place, then headed towards the pool. All of his classmates seemed to be on their way home already. Good. He needs some time alone anyway.  
Upon arriving at the pool he changed into his swimming trunks, which didn’t take more than a few seconds. He was about to jump right in when he suddenly froze.  
There was something in the water. It was at the other end of the pool, unmoving. Haru couldn’t tell from that far away, but it seemed like a person. He ran there and saw a man underwater with ties to his arms and his legs that were pulling him down, drowning him.  
Adrenalin rushed through Haru’s system as he jumped in and tried to untie the plummets, but they were too tight. Then he pushed the body closer to the edge and lifted the plummets out one by one, which wasn’t hard to do in the water. He pushed the man out of the pool, laying him on the tiles. He checked his pulse – his heart was still beating.  
Soon the man started coughing wildly, trying to push himself up. Haru knelt down in front of him, not knowing what to do. He tried the ties again but someone did a great job with them.  
“Why did you stop me?” the man said with a raspy voice when he finally could speak. He didn’t seem to be much older than Haru, he was probably in his twenties. He was wearing a greenish kimono, but it was all soaked.  
“Did you do that to yourself?”  
The guy was staring at the ground. “Yes. I have no reason to live. I’m a useless person who deserves to die”.  
“Don’t say that” Haru said quietly. After some silence he asked “Are you okay?”.  
“Not really. I think I’ll just go back to dying” he said hopelessly, starting to crawl back towards the pool.  
“No.” Haru grabbed his leg.  
“Why are you so obsessed with keeping me alive?” the man said, turning to face him “I’M IN DESPAIR! THIS SOCIETY THAT WON’T LET YOU DECIDE IF YOU WISH TO LIVE OR NOT HAS LEFT ME IN DESPAIR!”  
“Stop.” Haru sighed. This was definitely too much trouble for today.  
The man stopped. It seems like all he needed was throwing a little tantrum. He sat up and squinted his eyes at Haru. “I can’t see. Would you mind getting my glasses from the pool?”  
It wasn’t very hard to make him change his mind, Haru thought. He got back into the water, and it didn’t take long until he found the glasses. Considering that the guy’s hands were tied down, he pushed them on his nose himself.   
“Why our pool?”  
“They raised the security levels at the school where I teach due to an incident, so I can’t use that pool and this is the closest one to it. I didn’t think anyone would go for a swim this late after school.”  
Haru silently acknowledged. “I’ll go inside to get something I can cut your ropes with. Do not move.” He gave him his most serious glare.  
“Y-Yes!” The man said. Apparently, he had quite a weak personality.

Haru got back after a few minutes with a pocket knife. He knelt down and started cutting the ropes.  
“So I guess you like swimming” the man said to break the awkward silence that settled between them.  
“Yeah”  
He couldn’t think of anything else to keep the conversation going so he just silently let the boy free him.  
“What’s your name?” he asked eventually.  
“Haruka.”  
“Haruka-kun. I’m Itoshiki Nozomu. I teach at a high school near but recently I have gone missing.  
Haru raised an eyebrow.  
“No one knows where I am. And I don’t intend to go back anytime soon.”  
“What will you do then?” Haru asked, fidgeting with a piece of wet rope. This Nozomu person was… interesting. He was weird, but in a way that made Haru want to protect him a little. Just to make sure that he makes it home safe.   
“I… don’t know” he seemed embarrassed. “I thought I’d be dead by now”.   
Haru sat on the edge of the pool, with his legs in the water. The sensei followed him. He dangled his legs somewhat nervously.  
Haru sighed internally. This will be way too much trouble, but he can’t just leave this guy here on his own. He said he wouldn’t go back home. And Haru had no hope of a peaceful swim now anyway.  
“You can spend the night at my place if you have nowhere to go.”  
The sensei’s legs stopped dangling.  
“…Thank you.”  
Haru took that as accepting the invitation, so he slowly stood up. He wasn’t afraid of Itoshiki-sensei. No criminal would risk dying in order to get into someone’s house, and it seemed like he wasn’t very stable emotionally anyway. One night won’t hurt.  
He headed back to the changing rooms and got dressed. Nozomu was audibly cold, but there was nothing they could do about that now. They spent all the way home in mutual silence.  
That night, Itoshiki-sensei was provided a bath, a meal, and a tatami to sleep on.  
That night, Itoshiki-sensei wasn’t entirely sure if he truly wished to die.


	2. Busy morning

Makoto didn’t even bother ringing the bell at Haru’s front door. There was a 99,9% chance that he was in the bathtub anyway. And that they’re going to be late for school.  
“I’m coming in!” He said, opening the back door. The sound of a running hairdryer was coming from the living room, so that’s where he looked first. But instead of his friend, he saw a strange man wrapped in a blanket, trying to dry a kimono. He didn’t notice as Makoto stopped in the doorway and stared at the unusual scene in front of him.  
He cleaned his throat and said “Um… Hello”, trying to catch the guy’s attention.  
The man finally looked up at Makoto and turned off the hairdryer. “Oh. Good morning…” he said, seemingly not bothered at all by this situation. “Haruka is having a bath” he added.  
“Oh, right.” Makoto replied, then left the living room. It would be best to ask Haru what’s going on. He’s probably just a relative though. Makoto had a feeling that he must be a nice person.  
Haru was in the bathroom, just as expected.  
“Good morning, Haru-chan!” Makoto chimed.  
Haru didn’t look amused. Not that he ever looks amused, so that was fine. He opened his mouth to say something, but Makoto was faster.  
“Who is that guy in the living room? I’ve never seen him before.”  
“…Ah. He’s just… my uncle. His name is Nozomu.” Haru didn’t like lying to Makoto but this morning he really wasn’t in the mood for discussing morality and explaining why he decided it was a good idea to let a complete stranger stay the night. He can tell Makoto later. But it’s not like he has to anyway, because Itoshiki-sensei will go home today and never come back. Probably.  
“You never told me you had an uncle. But he seems nice” he said then reached his hand out “If you don’t start getting ready soon, we’ll be late for school”.  
Haru grabbed Makoto’s hand and got out of the bathtub. This could’ve been all sexy with bubbles covering him in just the right places, dripping down his body, except that he was not fond of bubble baths and he was wearing swimming trunks.   
They went back to the living room, where Nozomu was now dressed in his usual outfit, sipping tea from a mug with the kanji of melancholy printed on it. Haru did not remember owning a mug like that.  
“I made tea” the sensei said.  
Makoto poured himself some and watched Haru opening the fridge.  
“You’re not going to start making mackerel right now, are you? We should be leaving for school.”  
“Ah! School. It holds many painful memories for me” Nozomu decided to participate in the conversation.  
“How so?” Makoto asked, sitting down at the table, opposite from him.  
“I’m the teacher of a class full of troubled students. Oh, I haven’t even introduced myself properly. My name is Itoshiki Nozomu. Nice to meet you.”  
Itoshiki? That’s a bit weird, Makoto thought. Not that there couldn’t be thousands of reasons why he had a different name than Haru’s family. Maybe he took the name of his spouse or something. Makoto had no idea why he was wondering about it this long instead of introducing himself.  
“I’m Tachibana Makoto. Nice to meet you as well.”  
Uncomfortable silence fell upon the room. The only noise to be heard was the sputtering of the fish in the pan, coming from the kitchen.  
“Uh… are you married?” Makoto asked to break the silence. But the confused face he got as an answer indicated that this might not have been the best way to break the ice. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude. Please forget I asked that.” he added quickly.  
“No, I’m not married” Nozomu said with unfocused eyes, like he was recalling a memory “Although I have been forced to participate in the family ritual every year since I was old enough. Fortunately, I’m an expert at avoiding eye contact.”  
What family ritual? This is getting weirder. Is Haru hiding something? Is he secretly married because he couldn’t avoid eye contact or something?  
Suddenly he showed up with his breakfast and sat down next to Makoto.  
“Haru, how come you never told me about the marriage ritual? It sounds so weird…”  
“Huh?”  
“Your uncle just said it’s held every year. I can see why you would avoid it though.”  
“Huh?!” Nozomu was confused. In fact, all of them were confused.   
Haru sighed and put down his chopsticks, gathering his thoughts.  
“I lied. He’s not my uncle.”  
“Huh?!”  
“You told him I was your uncle? Why would you do that?” Nozomu asked.  
“Because explaining why I’d let a complete stranger feel at home in my apartment was not on my to-do list this morning.”  
“You let a stranger into your apartment with no supervision? Haru, that’s dangerous!” Makoto reasoned.  
“He was in need of help.”  
“I was not in need of help! I was doing just fine!” Nozomu defended his low level of pride.  
“If I wouldn’t have helped you, you’d be dead by now.” Haru said coldly.  
“Well, that’s what I was aiming for. But thank you, I appreciate that you went out of your way for me.”  
Then came the awkward (and for Makoto, confused) silence. Up until he stood up and motioned for Haru to do the same “We can discuss this after school, okay? We’re really late now.”  
Haru got dressed and they left for school, leaving Nozomu in the apartment. It didn’t look like he would go home if they locked him out anyway.  
He decided to take a nap. Being unconscious was better than being in despair, after all.


	3. Promise

The weather got even better since yesterday afternoon. Most students were on their way home already, only Haru and Makoto were still in their classroom. Haru was slow as always, but it was okay, because Makoto waited for him as always. He stood there, thinking about how weird their morning was. He had so many questions. He felt like he needed to know more about that guy who ended up in Haru’s apartment.  
“Makoto.” Haru’s quiet voice snapped him out of his thoughts.  
“Hmm?”  
“I couldn’t swim yesterday.”  
“Because of Nozomu?” Yesterday was still a bit of a mystery since Haru was still not in the mood to talk. Is he ever though?  
Haru nodded. Makoto silently acknowledged that he will go home alone today too.  
“Alright. Do you want me to check on him?”  
“Yeah” Haru handed him his keys. Makoto slid them into his pocket and waved goodbye.  
“Take care, Haru-chan!”  
….  
“I’m back!” Makoto stated as he stepped inside the apartment. Since no one responded, he went to look around.   
He didn’t have to go far; he found the weird guy in the living room, on the floor. He was lying in fetal position under his blanket (technically Haru’s, but he was clutching into it in his sleep), inhaling and exhaling in a slow but steady pattern. He was so childlike with his glasses off his relaxed face, mouth slightly open. Makoto smiled. Nozomu was almost as cute as Haru when asleep.  
He was just about to leave when he heard a quiet rustle. He turned back. Nozomu slowly pushed himself up onto his elbow, putting on his glasses.  
“Makoto?” he said in a sleepy voice.  
“Hey. Have you been asleep all day? I mean, that’s fine, I just came to check if you’re okay.” He said, walking closer.  
“How thoughtful of you. I’m fine, I just sleep as much as I can, as an alternative solution. Or rather a halfway-solution really.” he slowly sat up and embraced his knees.  
“Solution for what?” Makoto asked, sitting down in front of him. He decided he didn’t want to leave just yet.  
Nozomu took his time to think about that before answering. “…my life. I can’t wait to be granted my eternal sleep.”  
Makoto wasn’t sure how to respond to that. Going by what he heard this morning he did suspect that something like this was going on, but now he had a somewhat clearer picture in his head regarding what could’ve happened yesterday.   
“But you’re still here for a reason.”  
Nozomu sighed. “Yes. Thanks to your friend, my miserable life has been extended.”  
He looked so sad. Makoto thought about hugging him but it felt a bit inappropriate. Instead he tried to comfort him with words.  
“But you’re a valuable person. I’m sure there are people who would be heartbroken if you died.”  
Nozomu scoffed. “I do not doubt that. For some reason I’m pretty popular with teenage girls. One of my students has even moved into my house. But I don’t mind since she takes care of my nephew for of me.”  
“You have a nephew? See, a lot of people would miss you.” Makoto said reassuringly.  
“Hah, my nephew hates me. I’m sure he’s having the time of his life without me right now.”  
“I don’t see why anyone would hate you. You’re cute.”  
That visibly surprised Nozomu. He was even blushing a little. “C-cute?”  
“I-I mean…” Makoto felt really embarrassed for wording it that way. “When you were asleep just now. You looked so childlike and all…”  
“Ah. That might have been. I don’t look very manly, do I?”  
Makoto took a moment to examine his face. He had a nice face. A beard or some other features that are considered manly would just make him look ridiculous.  
“I think you look nice the way you are.”  
“You really think so?”  
Makoto smiled “I do”.  
Nozomu smiled too. Very lightly, but it was definitely a smile.  
“Promise me one thing, okay?” Makoto said suddenly “Promise that you stop trying to kill yourself.”  
Nozomu casted his eyes down “I don’t make promises I’m not sure I can keep.”  
Makoto did not seem to be surprised. He had to work on wording his thoughts better. He hesitated for a second, but then slowly lifted the man’s chin, so that he could look him in the eyes. That felt even more inappropriate but they were having a moment so it was probably fine, he thought.  
“Then promise this. You won’t kill yourself today.”  
Nozomu looked confused “Why do you care so much about me?”  
“I’ve told you. You’re a nice person and I don’t want you to die. Is that a good enough reason?”  
Nozomu wasn’t sure if anything was a good enough reason, but he’s survived many years living like this. He could do that for one more day for sure. “Well… for today it’ll do.”


	4. Stay

Days went by like this and Nozomu made it a morning routine to make breakfast for the boys while Haru was getting ready (or at least soaked enough for his liking). No one seemed to question why he doesn’t make Nozomu go away. He has his own house, his own job and his own family. It was immature of him to think that not showing up at his workplace for many days in a row had no major consequences.   
This domestic bliss lasted until the fourth evening, when they were all sat at the table writing homework, taking advantage of the fact that Nozomu was a teacher. He was glad to be able to show his gratitude in other ways than making breakfast (one time even lunchboxes) and cleaning the apartment a little while the boys were at school. Makoto became a frequent guest at Haru’s place, they always came home together to check how Nozomu was doing and finish their homework significantly faster than normally.  
That night Haru was more tense than usual. Today’s swimming practice was exhausting, and he was just so done with all the English he had to do for school. Important tests were due this week and he was behind in his studies. He was wondering if he should ask Nozomu to help him improve his English, but… he will leave soon, won’t he? He has a job, right? What the heck is he doing here this this long?  
Haru cleared his throat “Nozomu… I don’t want you to take this the wrong way, but don’t you have a class full of troubled students to teach?”  
For a short second Nozomu had a guilty expression on his face, but he was soon to reply “Er… one of my colleagues takes over for me while I’m missing.”  
“But you can’t be missing for too long or you’ll lose your job, right?” Makoto asked.  
A truly hopeless expression appeared on Nozomu’s face “Do you… do you mean you want me to leave? Is there really no place for me in this achievement-oriented society? I’M IN DESPAIR! WOULDN’T IT BE BEST IF I JUST DIED ALREADY?” he sprung up from the table and ran upstairs, feet thudding loudly.  
“WAIT, I DIDN’T MEAN IT LIKE THAT!” Makoto shouted after him but he either didn’t hear it or was too upset to respond.  
Haru and Makoto locked eyes, waiting for the other to say something. Not too surprisingly, Makoto was the first to talk.  
“Do you want him around, Haru?” it was high time he decided on that. No matter what, their current situation was doomed to be temporary.  
“Yes. I like him. He is weird but…” Haru didn’t finished the sentence.  
“…but without him something would be missing, right?” Makoto smiled “I know what you mean. It’s nice having him around.”  
Haru nodded in response, then shot a meaningful gaze in the direction of the stairs. Then back to his friend.  
“Yeah, let’s go after him.”  
They found him sitting on the floor, arms wrapped around his knees. He looked up at the boys with a very sad expression on his face. He then looked away and said “You know, this is the part where my students usually validate or contradict the negative way I perceive the world around me”.  
Makoto crouched down next to him.   
“In that case, let me try too.”  
Nozomu still refused to make eye-contact. “Try what?”  
“To contradict you. You are wrong to think that we don’t want you around. It’s just that you shouldn’t risk your stable job for the sake of spending time with us.”  
That made him look up.  
“So… you really don’t mind that I’m here with you? Are you suggesting that there is a place for me here? Or are you just saying that out of pity?”  
Haru looked him in the eyes and even though all he said was “stay”, Nozomu’s face lightened up a little. He was utterly touched. If this was a video game, he would’ve gained +100 HP (Hope Points) in this moment. Makoto stood up and reached out to pull him up. Nozomu took his hand and as he stood up, he pulled Makoto into a hug. The hug was soft and nice and when it ended, Makoto wished it lasted longer.  
The sensei then approached Haru and hugged him too. Haru looked very indifferent about it and when it ended, he wished it lasted shorter.  
“Thank you, boys. If you agree, then I think I’ll just go to work from here in the mornings.”  
“Fine with me.” Haru said. After a little pause he asked “Do you teach English at school?”  
“No, my main subjects are literature and biology. Why do you ask?”  
“Never mind then.”  
“I do speak English if that’s what you want to know. But I haven’t been practicing much in the past years…”  
“Oh. Then would you mind helping me out sometimes?”  
The sensei smiled “Sure, I’m glad to be of help”.  
“I can see why your students like you so much” Makoto said “I’m sure they can’t wait to see you again.”  
“Actually… I kind of miss them too. Even though they violate my rights.  
“What?”  
“As I said, I’ll go see them tomorrow. Ah, they might have tried to contact me via text message…” he reached in his pocket and pulled out his cell phone “Ah, yes. That’s comforting. I like being missed.”  
“What does it say?”  
“Actually I’ve gotten two. They say ‘Where are you, dipshit?’ and ‘If you keep missing, I will properly notify the police’.”  
Makoto and Haru weren’t entirely convinced about the comforting nature of the messages, but decided not to give voice to that.  
Makoto looked at the clock. “Is it this late?! I really need to go home now. Today was fun, see you two tomorrow!” He waved, then hurriedly left.  
Haru sighed. He was tired. He just wanted to sleep. Actually, he wanted Itoshiki-sensei to have a good night’s sleep too, so he made an offer “I have a room I don’t use. You can have it if you want.”  
“Really? You are too kind.”  
“It’s just a room and I said I don’t use it anyway. I’m sure it’s better than sleeping in the lounge.”  
“Oh. I’ll take it then. Thanks.” he smiled lightly.  
“I said it’s fine” Haru said in his usual cold voice. After a pause he added “Sleep tight, Nozomu.”  
The sensei wanted to hug him again. Haru acts so cold but he just gave him a better place to sleep and said good night. He’s never cared to do that before. But considering his reaction to the hug he got earlier, it was better not to do that again.  
“You too, Haru.”


End file.
